Sunday, June 28, 2009

introduction: ii kinda rock. But ii'm also self destuctive, selfish, insecure& probably the only reason i'm alive is cuz my friends KickAss!!

Soo today i begin a whole new blogg because my ex is a stalker, and even though i know nobody readss these stupid things. My lifes too inconsistant aand i tend to make impulsive decisions that end me up in strange situations, therefore i tend to lose journals, keys, phones, and other important assets, relativily easy.

~I used to care what other thought about but noww i couldn't give a shit, i'll listen to your objectives and try to understand them. But it will piss me off if you try to bother me, because you don't like my beliefs, attitude, or just general perspective of life. And its a 'terrible, horrible, no good, very bad' idea to do that.
Occasionally ii spectulate that not giving a shit probably is not always a great way to go about life. There are definitely some social guidelines missed out on, like i don't think i understand the concept a social relationship. Let me elaborate, i have 1 maybe 2 good friends that have never done anything to damage my trust. And normally i only hang with thesee people, to the point where wer were often confused for lesbians. & i've only really been able to have that click (you know where it feels like it just works) with two boys and only one ever lasted for a extended amount of time, then ended very badlyy. And maybe that parts normal cuz i am farely young. But both boys were bi-polar (not violent) but they changed on the drop of hat, and it kept me intrigued in a sick way.

I normally get along with everyone but i never found my niche, i jump around and never stay in one group for longg. Im Not all for labels but i want to know what i'd be categorized in, or maybe i am in a clique, i'm just ignorant to this fact.... i know i've fucked up alot, and i'm definitely alternative but i think some as bad ass to rebel, or be different, but most rebels rebel with other rebellers to be different and don't even really care about the cause, or look at both sides, i just but don't really realize there just enrolling in a total different segment of conformity . I dont feel the need to be accepted, i just want to know how i am conceived. And i honestly don't really care it would just be cool to know.
FUCK IT THIS IS ME IN MY EYES: i'm kinda out there, . i'm definitely more alternative, i like grungy boyish thinggs, but i'm still very vain and like to look ggood in/or doing grungy boyish things(i do this well). I Love writing on walls, but sometimes get in trouble for this. I love stoners there generally a fun group of people, but at the current moment in my life i don't do drugs. i dont know why i'm even writing about this, i just want you to get a general idea of me, maybe? Whatever main point (maybe not a main point, but iits definitely a good point) => I normally get along with everyone, i don't judge others experience in a black and white or right and wrong (mainly cuz i've done almost everything i could to fuck up and with alot of help from a few good friends, i got to a semi good place in my life. But i didnt do these thing cuz i was a bad person just got caught up in bad stuff) but its not what your doing or the label you have, mainly its about personality for me and if you need it that you know when to ask for help..

I took to much adderall with nothing to do... my minds racing and my fingers cant keep up i willl most llikely regret putting this on the internet but i doubt anyone really reads these fucking things. .

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